Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Year new hopes

A new year is upon me, in fact just six hours away at this writing. And quite honestly I can't wait.
The major even was my dad passing away. A year ago November he was diagnosed with bladder cancer. The urologist performed surgery the day after Thanksgiving and then everything went bad. First he had a heart attack under anestetic, then a week later suffered a stroke. This was followed by a month in the hospital and two more heart attacks. Through the next eight months he never fully recovered. At 86 it was a hard road but all we, the family, could do was hope. My father passed away on August 23rd 2011. What followed were tmes of sorrow and pain. And I'm still not quite recovered.

Other events seemed minor by comparison. The October prior one of my oldest friends told me that because of her new boyfriend we could no longer be friends. Apparently he was very jealous and felt more was going on than said. Let me say that when something like this happens a feeling of being disposeable falls upon you. Well to me at least.

I really haven'y much to add, I think the first paragraph set the tone. So here's to a new year and may it go well.

I let a year pass and felt it was time to make amends with another friend. I tried calling for a year but no answer. I texted and only received the briefest of replies when I received a reply. I finally emailed my apology though I would have preferred a face to face. What I learned made me wish I had not tried. I felt I had done something wrong and had made this weird between us. A week passed and she replied that was not the case nor her intention for me to feel this way. Rather she had made a choce of those friends she would make time for. I did not qualify. Can you say disposeable?

Well those were the lows.

The highs were school was going well and I found subjects I very much enjoyed. A friend returned from life abroad.